Steve felt the baby move!

Last night as I was relaxing the baby decided to go absolutely crazy! I was watching this large bump move all the way across my belly for the first time. Before i just small "pops", but yesterday was very different. Of course Steve was in the other room, so I yelled for him to come watch. And of course the baby stopped making any large movements. So Steve leaves the room and it starts up again, and again stops when he comes in! But luckily he was able to feel some smaller movements by the end of it all.

Last night it was so active, it was amazing! Although at 11:30 I had to talk to the baby to tell it to settle down bc it was bedtime. It was really cool when it listened and relaxed a bit!

At the birthing class on Saturday, we had this discussion about bonding with the baby. I haven't really felt the urge to bond by talking, singing or reading to the baby quite yet. Some of the other parents gave us great suggestions, like reading parenting books out loud. But as I feel the baby moving so much right now, and as the movements grow stronger, it has really hit me that I have a human growing inside of me. How strange but wonderful at the same time. And it has made this whole experience so much more real.

We have a lot of homework to do this week for class, although I don't mind that some of it includes getting massages from Steve :) Learning the light touch massage technique alone was worth the class! But we also have a lot of things to do that I think will really strengthen our family bond. This week we have to write down all of our fears and discuss them with our partners. I think it will really give us an opportunity to discuss what we are apprehensive about, and hopefully it will help me release some of the fears I harbor internally. And that will hopefully help allow me to release more during the labor.

I know my biggest fear is still giving birth at a hospital. Not that there is anything wrong with hospitals, and I do feel like I have found an OB who understands and supports me. But I am also afraid that bc the Drs at the BI deal with so many high risk pregnancies, that they will opt to go for inductions or a c-section much more quickly than if I had a mid-wife or a doula there. I still really wish we could go to the Birthing center in Cambridge, especially since all of the potential health issues I had seem to be resolving nicely. Steve did say he would be more open to a doula, so I may really have to start my search again. They are a lot more than what I would like to spend, but I am also going to look for a doula in training. That will save some money and provide someone with the experience they need to finish their training. I know it sounds silly that we need to hire a "coach" to get us through labor, but it's an awful lot to ask of both of us to "fight the system" we are in at the BI, and have to be so vocal of what we want. It is so much easier when you have people around you who are on the same page and can help create the atmosphere we will need to have a calm labor.